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Posts Tagged ‘screen time’

Finding That Predictable Daily Routine

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

co-sleepingOne of the most popular questions from moms is about how I structure my days with my children.

When I was the mama of my first child I remember a love-hate relationship with my days and with motherhood.  I adored sleeping in with my baby; those cozy mornings snoozing and nursing together were so heavenly.  I was one of those moms who had to shower before I could do anything else.  I would have her sit in her exercise saucer or bouncy seat in the bathroom.  I had a clear shower curtain so I could watch her.  After breakfast we would putter around cleaning up and much of the time I would wear her in a back pack carrier or in a sling.  The days felt so long and they involved nursing and sleeping, cooking and cleaning.  There was a beautiful quietness to those days and I remember trying to accept them and cherish them.

There were weeks of complete indulgence when Isabel loved to nurse and sleep during the day for a few hours and we would just snuggle on the bed and I watched Dawson’s Creek reruns.  It was a guilty pleasure.  But I also felt like it was this unique time with this little being who was growing up before my eyes.

Life with a toddler became more challenging for me. She had her own opinions, likes, and dislikes.  She was different than me.  I had to learn her toddler-ease to communicate.  When I pulled, she pushed.  For awhile I felt lost as a mom.  I had no interest in playing on the floor or running at the park.  I realized that I had to find a way to enjoy spending time with a young child.  Fortunately, I came to see that I was the center of her universe, not the other way around.

sweet_siblingsWhen I became the mom of two young children, a 3 year old and a newborn, I felt like the world had fallen on my shoulders.  It had taken me 3 years to adjust to being Isabel’s mom.  I remember trying to figure out how I would nurture them both?  Thankfully, at that time, I had the flexibility to focus my energies on mothering and home life; I had few distractions.  I took it one day at a time.  Three mornings each week, Isabel went to a Waldorf home nursery and that provided me with time with the baby by ourselves.  Again, a heavenly time of sleepy nursing together.

And now, things have evolved again. I have an elementary school student and preschooler.  Life has fallen more into place for me and I’m adjusting to working from home and meeting the needs of my family.

Finding predictable routines has been my saving grace.  A sample daily rhythm…

School Morning
6:20am Snuggle time with mommy upon waking, drifting back to sleep.
6:35am Quiet play – the kids create games or read books while I get ready.
6:45am Simple breakfasts of  their favorite protein meal shake, or egg and toast, or oatmeal, or cold cereal.  Warm tea with honey.  I make their lunches for school.
Morning prayers with daddy.
7:10am Getting dressed, brushing hair, shoes on, using the bathroom, more play.
7:55am Leave for school

Home Morning If your child isn’t in school yet…
7am Wake up, dressing, breakfast, clean-up.
8am Household chores – sweeping, windows, laundry, etc.
9am Outdoor walk, sand or water play, swinging.
10:30am Snack – fruit, granola bar, crackers, or raisins.
11:00am Indoor play and clean up
12:30pm Lunch

Afternoon
12:30pm Pick up preschooler. For those with school
1:00pm Nap time.
3:15pm Pick up 1st grader.
3:45pm Home snack – apples with peanut butter, yogurt w/granola, or an egg with cheese.  I try to make sure this snack includes protein.
4:00pm Outdoor play or creative indoor play (this is usually on their own).

DSCF0007Evening
5:00pm Dinner prep and household clean-up.  I try to include the kids as much as possible in the cutting of veggies or mixing ingredients.  I want them to set the table more often.  They’ve put together puppet shows and other creative productions during this time, or they listen to music and jump on the mini trampoline.
6:00pm Dinner together.
6:30pm Bath time.
6:50pm Out of the bath, pajamas, brush teeth.
7:00pm 1-2 stories, candles, prayers/songs.
7:30pm Hugs & Kisses, Lights Out.

The more predictable and consistent I am in holding them with this rhythm, the easier and more simple our days are together and the more I enjoy their company.  Because they know what to expect, and especially since we no longer have television as an option in their day, I find that things are slower, more peaceful, and even fun!

Tags: Children Under Age 7, family culture, Kim John Payne, routine, screen time, simplicity parenting, Waldorf
Posted in simplicity | No Comments »

Love Letters

Wednesday, November 18th, 2009

istock-hands-on-keyboardThese are notes sent to me in response to my latest newsletter article, Confessions of a TV-Using Mom, from the Noble Mother community of mamas. Thanks, mamas!!

***

Congratulations raelee!  Being a TV-free family is great!  We made the same descision when our first child was born, 8 years ago.  We have never regretted it.  We still have a small, 13in TV, behind closed doors in our bedroom, and we have family movie night twice a month.  On these nights, we all cuddle up together, under the covers, and my husband and I enjoy sharing our childhood favourites with our kids, as well as watching timeless classics – like Shirley Temple movies (my 5 year-old’s fave) and the Andy Griffith show (my 8 year old’s fave!).

We’ve also started to watch some select new movies – we’ve even gone to the local movie theatre (we only have one in our small town, it only shows 1 movie at a time, and a kid’s movie about once every 3-4 months) after we noticed that our son was feeling a little out of the loop socially, and my husband and I have definitely added some new favourites to our repertoire.  We’ve talked about product placement with the kids (and for older kids, the movie Josie and the Pussycats is a fun way to demonstrate how this works) and I feel that this advetising stretegy is less overt than commercials, although toy spin-off’s from movies may be alluring even so.

Thankfully, living in a small town,with no box stores, shields us from the worst of that commercialism as well.  Life is far from perfect – the kids fight, they make a lot of messes, they get in my hair (unavoidable in a 900 square foot house!) and they still whine for TV every once in a while, but we also play a lot of board games, we have a family bluegrass band, and both my kids were early readers, and continue to have a passion for reading.  I’ve agonized and second-guessed myself over many of my parenting descisions, but staying TV-free isn’t one of them!  Welcome to the club!

Love, Dana.

***

thanks for the newsletter!
i think computers and TV are about the same — same thing, electronics — no difference.  I try to minimize both as much as possible. when my kids are napping/quiet time (like now!) i try to catch up on the computer.  when they are up, its outdoors time or pool time — anything active to keep them busy.
i totally agree with you about toys!  downstairs in their playroom (as you can see pics on our blog http://lifeonhazelstonelane.blogspot.com) is very minimalist.  some books, some dolls, dress up clothes, an easel for drawing, a table with chairs, etc.  the ONLY electronic toy they have is the TAG book.  i love it.  the kids are calm.  their bedrooms are VERY simple — just a twin bed each, a dresser and a basket of some books.  that’s it.  i wanted them to become connected to nature instead of being stimulated by toys, etc, before bed.
hope today was a great day for your kids at waldorf!
hugs!!!
joy

***

Hi Raelee,

I just wanted to say, “Thank you” for your ezine.
I appreciate your perspective and I often find myself nodding as I read it.
Thanks again,

Maria

***

Hey Raelee,
I think you’ll appreciate this article I just read for the Wilmette course, “Human Flourishing and Moral Development” by Darcia Narvaez:  http://www.nd.edu/~dnarvaez/documents/NarvaezFlourishing2008.pdf

She includes this quote: “Who tells the stories of a culture really governs human behavior.  It used to be the parent, the school, the church, the community.  Now its a handful of global conglomerates that have nothing to tell, but a great deal to sell.” (Gerbner, 1994)

ENJOY!
Lee

Tags: Kim John Payne, screen time, simplicity parenting, toys, Waldorf
Posted in simplicity | No Comments »

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