Oh, I recognized what you wrote here: Your child can pick up on your unrest, your dissatisfaction, your resentment of mothering.

When I read Cheryl Richardson’s newest book on the art of extreme self-care last year, she talked about how when a mother doesn’t take care of herself, her children feel her resentment. The consequence is that they then feel responsible for mom’s happiness – and they also feel like they have to compromise their happiness. They don’t feel like they can outshine their mother. They are burdened.

Wow, did that hit home for me.

Here’s what I learned: a mother’s happiness (perhaps contentment is a better word) provides the safe container for the child to create their own happiness.

I am amazed at how much my children pick up on from me. I can have a song in my head and they pick up on it and start singing it without my saying a word. Or I’ll be thinking of someone and they’ll say, “Let’s call so and so,” the very person I was just thinking about. This happens so frequently it’s eerie. It makes me pause about what other thoughts they are picking up on – like the thoughts about my wanting to run away from home when I am overwhelmed or my thoughts of irritation when they are oinky.

Thank you for the food for thought, Raelee.